I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
