Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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