Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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