Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
