When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
