She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
