let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
