how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
