She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
