So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
