Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
