I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
