You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
