He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
