That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I woke up under a house in Key West
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
