i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
