Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
