Ambien. No doubt about it.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
