who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize