I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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