I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
