just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
