Kiss
Puke
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I wish you could order shots online.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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