And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
