Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
