I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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