It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
her vagine was all disorganized.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
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