How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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