In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
