it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
