Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
