Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
