Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Randomize
