Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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