so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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