That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
