It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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