What a fucking waste of an outfit
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
