i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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