She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
She swung at the pinata with crutches
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
