Is it normal to miss your booty call?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
