Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
