You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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