you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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