I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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