i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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