Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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