so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
