Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
