I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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